It has been approximately 17 months since I added extensions to my hair. I wouldn't say that it was a conscious decision to step away from extensions, I just found that with each week and each wash day I desired the extensions less.
I will be honest with you, this decision albeit subconscious was not initially birthed from a place of love for my natural hair. I was tired! Yes, I was physically tired. Now you might ask what physical exhaustion has to do with my hairstyle. Well, since I relocated to the UK I have braided, twisted and styled my hair myself because I simply could not afford to set aside the amount of money that the hairstylists were requesting. I also styled my hair myself in Nigeria but it was not constant as I had the luxury of walking into a saloon and getting a fairly acceptable style at a very affordable rate. Well, that was not the case here, there was not a very or even fairly affordable rate for me. So then came the long hours of picking X-pression attachments, striving for straight parts and extending my arms above my head to ensure all those kinky locks were neatly tucked in, all to achieve the desired look.
So yes, I slowly became tired of the entire process and just couldn't open another pack of X-Pression attachment. This caused me to focus a lot more on my natural hair and my motivation eventually aligned with my love for my natural hair.
I love my hair, I love the curls and waves, the ease of waking up in the morning with twists and even the hassle of wash days (okay, maybe not). Without the long-lasting protective styles like braids and twists with extensions, I had to learn how to be more intentional about caring for my hair. At the same time I didn't want to be overwhelemed by the work of natural hair maintenance.
Through my search for relevant tips I discovered that there is a lot of information out there, a lot of 'How to take care of your natural hair'-type content. Some of which were encouraging and instructive and some that seemed to portray natural hair care as a task that could be compared to climbing mount Everest.
I think it is wonderful to love your natural hair and want to nourish it with the best products but I also think that along with the new wave of 'natural hair love' has come a level of pressure that a lot of women are not necessarily prepared to navigate through.
I want my hair to grow and I want to retain length as much as the next natural hair lover but I do not want to feel pressured to set unrealistic hair goals that require a 100 million products and I don't think anyone should feel that way. If you are in a position to have a 15-step hair care process, amazing but if you are not, know that your natural hair doesn't have to be a burden. It will require some work but it doesn't have to break your bank account or motivation.
I am simple with my hair regimen but apart from my really good hair gene, my simple regimen has worked for me. It keeps it healthy and prevents breakage.
So love your hair with all your might but do not feel pressured to meet some unrealistic expectations set by social media. Study your hair, get to know it, study yourself, get to know your capability when it comes to hair care and most importantly, your budget and set realistic hair goals.
All in all, I miss my braids sometimes and how they make me look but I genuinely love how I have embraced the range and diversity that I can achieve with my natural hair. And while I haven't even scratched the surface of the styles I could achieve, I am loving the journey I am on. It is a personal journey and I encourage you, yes you beautiful curly or kinky sister with your 4c, 3b or 4a hair, carve your own path and do not be pressured into despising the process of caring for your hair. Set your own goals, love the process of working towards achieving them and watch your crown flourish!
Love
M.I
PS: My wonderful boyfriend would like you to know that he was instrumental in the bye bye extension decision.
Comments